When John was a child, his father would come home from a night of drinking, angry and volatile. During those times neither John nor his sisters would know what to expect. He could be verbally and physically abusive to them. John remembers hiding behind the couch one night when he heard his dad’s car ...
Core Wound: I Don’t Measure Up
I believe that at the core of every core wound is shame. Edward Welch provides an apt description of shame: “You are shunned. Faces are turned away from you. They ignore you, as if you didn’t exist. You are naked. Faces are turned toward you. They stare at you, as if you were hideous. ...
Core Wound – “I Am Weak or Powerless”
How did you feel, just reading the title of this blog post? Has this ever been you? Has this been your story for some time? If you’ve been following along in our core wounds series, you’ll know that we have been exploring the beliefs about ourselves that have developed and prevented us from growing ...
“The Father Wound” – Understanding Problems in the Child & Father Relationship
The “Father Wound” is a trauma wound affecting more people than drugs or alcohol combined. It cuts deeper than flesh and bone and works its way to the soul. It affects both sons and daughters, the rich and poor alike without prejudice. The father wound leaves a wake of destruction in its path more ...
Core Wound: “I’m Defective”
In a nutshell, core beliefs are a person’s most central ideas about themselves, others, and the world. These beliefs act like a lens or pair of glasses through which every situation and life experience is seen. In cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), core beliefs are believed to underlie automatic ...
Core Wounds – “I Am Unknown”
The desire to be known is at the core of the human experience. We were created for a relationship with God and for relationships with each other, in which we are fully known and fully loved. This is why the core wound of “I am unknown” can feel especially deep and painful. A core wound is pain that ...
What is a Core Wound?
Sex Addiction and our Relational Wounds
We come into this world expecting that our needs are going to be met. From the womb to our last breath, we yearn for affirmation, comfort, care, security, guidance, and a place of belonging. When these needs are appropriately attuned to, we tend to have a good sense of who we are, where we want to ...
‘Tis the Season to be Depressed and Overwhelmed
Christmas is a joyous and beautiful time of the year and yet you may find yourself overwhelmed and depressed. It is that time of year where the Christmas trees have been adorned with lights and decorations, and the joyous sound of Christmas carols can be heard in malls, shopping centers and ...
Why Is Sex Addiction So Difficult to Stop?
Why Is Sex Addiction So Difficult to Stop? Andrew sat across from me in my office and echoed a refrain I have heard many times. With both resignation and confusion, he asked me why, despite strong effort, he had not been able to stop acting out his sex addiction. His method of acting out was ...
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